New Years Resolutions......Take Two!

Everyone is blogging, posting, writing about it.  Even NPR has a feature story about it.  All the talk shows are a buzz with advice regarding improving your health, losing weight, etc.  Lots of sermons, lots of cheery words of encouragement, lots of religious banter, and lots of "you should do this, you should do that, God can fix everything, la la la."  So here goes - get ready - my new year's resolution for 2011 was to live healthier.

I kept my STINKIN 2011 NEW YEARS RESOLUTION -  OH BABY, YES I DID!  Did God help me?  Surely, but by making ME do the work. No amount of prayer can accomplish healthy life choices - I'm just sayin.  Maybe asking God for the strength to carry on helps, but if you keep laying on the sofa or in bed, and you keep popping bon-bons, that prayer ain't gonna make a difference.  Come on - you know God helps those that help themselves (and others).

I quit smoking in 2010, made it 1 year with no cigarettes on July 1, 2011, and turned 50.  Now granted - the biggest issue I've had since I quit smoking is I can't sleep now - through all my life issues I've typically been able to sleep but now I cannot get to sleep or stay asleep - bad, bad lingering side effect of Chantix - working on that one.  I'm sure I shared with some of you my technicolor dreams of grandeur, that Ellen & Oprah are a couple living on the Soque fishing with Tom Wilbanks & Ted Turner, living in a cabin with shag carpet on the walls, and other similar dreams.  NOT liking the CPAP machine, NOT liking medicines, NOT liking not sleeping. Trying to figure this out is very complex and reform is hard!

My new year's resolution for 2011 was to become healthier - in MANY areas of my life - physically, emotionally, spiritually. I did it! Did I fall down - oh yeah! Did I cheat & eat A TON of Caramel Coast & Pumpkin Pie ice cream?  UM YEAH I DID.  But - I ran/walked 3 5Ks and one 10K, and made running a part of my life. I signed up for a 1/2 marathon in April 2012 and am running another 10K on 1/21/2012.  

My cholesterol was close to 290 December 2010 - it is now around 180 - white blood cell count, almost normal!

NOW I still have some issues with food, I ain't gonna lie.  And I still wanna make ALL the same excuses I've always made to not exercise - too cold, too hot, baby toe hurts, nose running, zit on nose, arthritis in my toes & fingers, ganglion cysts between my toes, high white blood cell count, fat that requires it's own "sports bra" mid-waist to control the jiggling around while running, and a host of other health issues that I don't care to divulge.  

But overall - I've eaten healthier in 2011 - on purpose!  I've gone from 235 pounds on July 1, 2010, to between 181-190 pounds (yep - it fluctuates THAT much on me).  By ANY stretch of the imagination I've accomplished something amazing - but I feel there is so much more to do in this "arena."  And shedding my protective FAT is very painful - because no matter the "physical" pains involved in living healthy - let's face it - the emotional part of "facing the fat" is the hardest part.  Oh I like my blanket of chubbiness that protects me from exploring relationships - just give me a 1/2 gallon of ice cream & baby I'll help YOU solve all your problems!  JUST leave ME alone, got it?  No seriously - facing all your demons related to health (physical, mental, spiritual) is exhausting and liberating.  And Burton, sweet baby Burton, is going away to college.  Oh my.

So my whole point, from which I obviously digressed, is that I am making the SAME New Years Resolution for 2012 - to live healthier. To get off the couch, out of the bed, and RUN.  Go to the gym, pay the trainer, and conquer this physical body.  It only takes changing ONE thing, really.

God gave me a brain, a spirit, a spunk, and I am going to use these gifts to be all that I can be.  My heart is and has always been an open book - anyone that knows me, knows THAT! I've always put others before self - still do & if not careful, at my own expense.  Call it selfish, call it what you will, but God has led me directly to this point - self-care!  I couldn't face it until now - love of self - and I struggle with it every moment of every day - but I will succeed, I will, I will!!

Happy, HAPPY, New Year to all my family & friends - I love you all so very much!  Bless each of you for being a part of my life, blessing me with your time & talents, and most of all sharing your hopes and dreams with me.  And just to give you hope - here are 2 pictures - one at 220 pounds, one at 186 pounds.  Let's LIVE!

220 pounds

186 pounds

Hell on Heels..............

I decided late yesterday afternoon that I needed - yes NEEDED - better music to walk/run with.  I'm using an "app" on my phone that requires my music to have a certain "beat per minute" because I walk a minute, run a minute, and so on.  Jeff Galloway - yep, the man himself - coaches me through my workouts, and today was my first LONG walk/run - 40 minutes - with a 3 minute warm-up & 3 minute cool-down.  


So yes, I needed, NEEDED, needed new music.  I am sick of the same old music - I now officially hate "Sexy Back" and "My Sharona."  And if I ever hear "I Will Survive" again I most assuredly will PUKE.  


Opened up iTunes, grabbed the trusty debit card, and searched & searched until I found stuff that had the right BPM.  The only OTHER criteria was that the song had to make me feel pissed off (yep - figure THIS out), happy, inspired, and make me laugh.  I don't even remember now how I came across this group, Pistol Annies, a new "girl-group" Miranda Lambert started.  I don't even listen to country music anymore, but this song met ALL my criteria - it pissed me off, made me feel happy, inspired me, and MADE ME LAUGH OUT LOUD!!!


My last blog was about dating - and my readiness to start that adventure.  WELL SUGAR this song (and a really sweet, kind comment from a dear friend who is MUCH younger but also much wiser) confirmed that I'm ready, willing, and more than able.  I'm still a little chubby, a little clumsy, and a little nervous, and a little scared.  But as each day passes I realize - with a LOT of help from my girlfriends - thank you KAY and MARY and DEBBIE and MARGIE and CHANDA and JOY - that I am a catch - I am pretty - I am smart - I AM WORTHY damn IT ---- I am Hell on Heels.


So take a listen, take a look, and look out SUGAR DADDY, I'm coming for YOU!





Lyrics to Hell on Heels :

I'm hell on heels
Say what you will
I done made the devil a deal
He made me pretty
He made me smart
And I'm gonna break me a million hearts
I'm hell on heels
Baby, I'm coming for you

This diamond ring
On my hand's
The only good thing
That came from that man
Got a G.T.O. from one named Joe
And a big piece of land down in Mexico
I'm hell on heels
Baby, I'm coming for you

I got a pink guitar
A Lincoln town car
From ol' what's his name
I meet at a bar
Got a high rise flat in Hollywood
From a married man wasn't up to no good
I'm hell on heels
Baby, I'm coming for you

Then there's Jim
I almost forgot I ran him off
But I took the yacht
Poor ol' Billy
Bless his heart
I'm still using his credit card
I'm hell on heels
Sugar daddy, I'm coming for you

I'm hell on heels
Say what you will
I done made the devil a deal
He made me pretty
He made me smart
And I'm gonna break me a million hearts
I'm hell on heels
Baby, I'm coming for you

I'm hell on heels
Say what you will
I done made the devil a deal
He made me pretty
He made me smart
I'm gonna break me a million hearts
I'm hell on heels
Sugar daddy, I'm coming for you

Maybe it's time.........to date

Seriously - not a blogger.  But have some things that I need to get out of my head, off my chest, and into the cosmos.  I joke all the time about Facebook sending me messages about "find the love of your life" on this dating site or "meet Mr. Right" on this site.  Need a boyfriend?  Facebook will help you find THE right online dating venue.  If ONLY it were that simple.......


I've made so many positive changes in my life in the past year.  But dating?  Let's see how many excuses I can put forth!  


(1)  Burton is still at home & it will "mess him up."  
(2) I am not at my goal weight yet..... 
(3) Just started a new job, no time for this nonsense.
(4) Must finish graduate school FIRST.
(5) Would have to shave my legs occasionally.
(6) Might have to whiten my teeth so my dazzling smile looks better.
(7) Might have to REALLY clean my house, not just spit clean
(8) Can't let anything interfere with my time with my grandson :)


You get the point!  Great excuses, all valid, yet somehow NOT valid.  I have a really good friend who met and/or reconnected to the love of her life AFTER 50 - they married, they are sickeningly happy, and I love hearing all about it.  I was married for 16 years --- not long by today's standards.  And I thought I would NEVER even entertain the thought of marrying again, and then my friend goes off & does it - and dang it - she is HAPPY!!  


I look around sometimes & think - hmmmm --- Burton is a senior, he will leave next August & he might not ever live at home again.  Yep - just me & Emma - my crazy Jack Russell.  Grad school is a given, but I'll still have some free time.  Grandson is busy - can still see him.  I've decided I need to make a list of the reasons why I should date, so here goes (feel free to comment/add to my lovely list):


     (1) Free dinners
     (2) I haven't had sex since 1996.......
     (3) I don't want to spend the rest of my life "alone"
     (4) I haven't had sex since 1996......
     (5) I want to fall in love
     (6) Ditto #4
     (7) I want to share my  fears, joy, happiness, with someone else
     (8) Free movies


The moral of THIS little blog is that maybe it's time.  Time to give it a chance, time to have some fun.  So family, friends, Facebook --- feel free to "fix me up."  I look forward to starting THIS adventure!

On the mark, set set, GO!!

I was playing with my grandson in Target yesterday, buggy racing, and Mikey says, "Come on Nanna, on the mark, set set, GO!!"

Prophetic words from such a little fella.  Nanna is definitely "on the mark, set set, GO!!"  In the last year I've quit smoking, graduated from college, changed my eating habits (and a terrible cholesterol number), learned to cook again, started a routine exercise program, started training for a 5K, decided on graduate school, applied to graduate school, lost ALMOST 20 pounds, and [insert DRUM ROLL here ] I am changing jobs.

WHAT???  Changing jobs the same year I turn 50???  Well, why not?  I've been with Piedmont for 11 years.  I've been faithful, hard-working, and loyal.  I have much to offer and sometimes when you stay at the same place you get stuck. 

Sometimes "perception" can be a serious problem related to career growth, and you need a new set of eyes evaluating your skill set, helping to create a new perception.

Someone commented that my journey has been difficult --- at work.  I paused to think --- what exactly do they mean by that?  An "ah ha" moment.......this person seriously intermingled some very personal struggles to my job.  I haven't had a difficult work journey --- but I have had a seriously difficult personal journey.  So you see?  People that you work with come to know you on a personal level, and many times they confuse your "real life" with your work life.  My work has NOT been affected, in any negative way, whatsoever, by my personal struggles. In fact, just the opposite is true. My work is BETTER because of my journey. I see the struggle of the student in a completely new, and compassionate, light.  I became a better employee, and it showed, oh yes, it certainly showed.

So Mikey - I want to thank you sweet boy!  Pushing that buggy really FAST in Target - with you yelling at the top of your lungs --- NANNA ---- ON THE MARK, SET SET, GO!! --- just confirmed what I already knew.......I gotta go :)